My husband was called for jury duty, served for 6 days, caught C19.  Gave it to me.  We were sick for a week when Steve said he needed to go to the ER.  He wasn’t eating much, had chills and was short of breath.  We went.  We were given chest x-rays, blood work.  I was given a antibiotic prescription and told to go home.  Steve was on oxygen and given IV antibiotics and steroids. We were told he needed to be in the hospital for 5 days, and that I  not visit.

He seemed to be doing OK for the first few days but they extended his stay, increasing his oxygen intake.  Steve and I discussed drugs via phone and he told me they wouldn’t give him Ivermectin or Hydroxychloroquine.  I begged him not to let them intubate him.  He said he told the doctor only as a last resort, and that he would call me before he would allow that.

During this time, I was extremely sick with C19.  My oxygen level was 82.  My husband wanted me to go to the hospital, but I refused.  At 11 p.m. on 09/12/21, the hospital called me to say they intubated Steve.  The doctor said Steve asked to be ventilated but I knew it was a lie.

The next morning they called and told me to get there asap as Steve was on three (3) lopressors, four (4) was dangerous and he might die.  I rushed over. Steve’s BP stabilized.

I went every day and looked through the window at my husband of 36 years. I’d call every night to check on him.  One night ,they said he was semi conscious and let me talk to him.  The next morning I went, and he was still drugged, but semi conscious.  They let me in to see him.  He was so swollen with air that he could only open one eye.  I held his hand and talked to him. I think he saw me.

During this time his kidneys failed and they started doing daily dialysis.  He had a feeding tube.  They were supposed to move the intubation to a trach to “help” his recovery but the first time they were going to, they screwed up and started his dialysis and had to postpone to the next day.  The one ICU doctor said the trach needed to be done asap for recovery.

The next day they were all assembled to do the trach…but wait, Steve was so swollen they needed an extra long trach tube, and they didn’t have one!  So, postponed another day.  They finally got it done, but it was too late.  Steve never woke up again.

We discussed letting him go because he wasn’t breathing on his own at all. They called at 6 a.m. on 09/26/21, to tell me he wasn’t going to survive.  I rushed over.  I held his hand, touched his feet which were not covered.  They felt like solid ice.  They let his nose bleed and there was blood caked in his mustache.  They actually asked to do a blood transfusion on him but couldn’t tell me why it was needed.  I refused. They turned off the ventilator.  He never took a breath on his own.  It was done.